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It seems like this musing should start out with that famous fangirl word that starts with an ‘S’ and ends with lots of ‘eeeeeee’s. Oh happy, happy day.

So way back yesterday (the day we should now label 4/17/11B.E.K., Before Epic Kiss) I posted a lil rambling rumination called ‘Will She? Won’t She’ where I said and I quote (cause your asses were too busy looking at Gucci suits to read my inner dialogue): “Part of me hopes now that BD filming is over you say ‘fuck it I’m going and I’m gonna rock it and all those bitches can be jealous.’”

Oh Stewie. You so did not disappoint. And what I love is I know you could have given two shits about disappointing us. But you didn’t disappoint him. You got all dolled up, but didn’t pose for a single picture. Because you didn’t get decked out in that fuckhawt dress for us. You did it for him. It was his big night and having you on his arm, as his biggest supporter, must’ve made it so much sweeter for him.

I love the way you love him. 

It’s part of what makes me admire you so very much.

You do it so quietly. In such a classy way. You love ‘Rob’. And by that I mean the real person. The one we don’t know. We know Robert – the actor. The tiny slice of a person we get to see in 10 minute interviews and 4 page magazine spreads. You know him and for so long it’s been so clear to many of us that you love him. You’ve shown us in your own little ways. The subtle jewelry. The shared clothes. The quiet rendezvous on movie sets or holidays. In my mind, all these things were your soundless confirmation of something you feel no need to cheapen by putting to words.

If you were like the other 99% of Hollywood starlets you would be trying to get papped with him every damn chance you could. But you don’t need to be ‘Robert Pattinson’s girlfriend’. You are clearly happy just being Rob’s girl. 

And last night that’s exactly what you were. You weren’t there to make a splash. You weren’t there as Hollywood’s It Girl. You were just a girl in love with a boy. *sigh*. I love that.

I knew you wouldn’t walk the carpet. One, it’s not your style. Two, it was their night to shine. And although you seem befuddled by it – you have a way of outshining people. This was one time that sneaking in the back door was such an elegant way to make a grand entrance.

And that brings me to your big ‘fuck it’.

Dear lord. You had us at the hand holding on the way out the theatre door…. So the after-party ‘fuck it’ was like giving us a visit from Santa and the Easter bunny all in the same night.

I have seen so many pictures of you getting into a car in misery. I actually always feel so guilty glimpsing pap pics of you in a car, because you are always so very clearly miserable. You curl yourself into a ball, you flip the bird, you pull your hair in front of your face and turn away from the windows so they only catch your back. Your message is always loud and clear. Fuck off assholes. You’re not making a dime off of me.

But not last night.

To most people it’s a tiny smooch. But, I think, you were making a big fat statement. Those flashbulbs were popping like strobe lights in a Vegas strip club. You knew we were watching. The nervous smile, the nose tug, the wide eyes and happy smile. Maybe they would have gotten lucky and caught all that. But then there’s the turn. You turned. You turned TOWARD the window and let them all capture your smiling face. 

And I am speechless over the volumes that speaks.

You decided to let us witness your happy. And I don’t know if it was one to many whiskeys or being drunk off the buzz of a beautiful night that allowed you to let it happen. But seeing you that carefree was…heartwarming. 

You didn’t disappoint last night and I sincerely hope we don’t disappoint you now with all our stupid girlish giggling. I respect you so much for protecting what is yours all this time. In my heart I think you fear the money shot not because of what it will do to you – but because you worry once you give them the shots of your happy – they will all be in search of any tiny moment they can spin as your sad. They will twist those shots into something they can fabricate and sell. And many times those are the money shots that destroy people who walk in shoes like yours. So I will not fault you if you go back into your shell. Protect it. Take care of it.  

I know you wish we’d all get a life and go away and let you live yours. As totally, freakishly BIZZARE as it is (and trust me, we all know we need a 12-step program) I just wish you both knew how much happiness you both spread by just being happy with each other.

Life’s short. Say ‘fuck it’ more often.


( 23 comments — Leave a comment )
Apr. 18th, 2011 09:53 pm (UTC)
KStew is singing Cee Lo's Eff You Song
I love LOVED this post. Really captured all of it!!!!


Kelly (kelysuperficial on twitter)
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:40 am (UTC)
Re: KStew is singing Cee Lo's Eff You Song
Thanks honey! So glad you enjoyed it. =)
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:23 am (UTC)
And that's it. Exactly. *clap* *clap* *clap*
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:31 am (UTC)
Found this post via Twitter. Just so you understand how some random person found your journal.

That being said, I completely agree with everything you said in this post. I love all the little subtle ways she supports him without ever wanting to be in the spot light when it's not her night. She didn't want last night to be about him at all, but at the same time, once the paparrazzi and the fans caught wind of her being there, she didn't shy away from claiming what was hers even a little.

It was really nice to see them both so happy. They deserve it.

Edited: Also, do you mind if I link this in my journal?

Edited at 2011-04-19 04:32 am (UTC)
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:39 am (UTC)
They so do deserve it!! Couldn't agree more! Thank you for sharing your thoughts too!! Please feel free to link it and share with anyone =).

Apr. 19th, 2011 12:43 am (UTC)
Just noticed my typo "She didn't want last night to be about him at all" that him should be a her. It's been a long day. Oops. Anyway... I figured you'd agree with me. Thanks so much for the permission to link to it. Didn't want to just run off with your blog post without permission :)
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:43 am (UTC)
I love your post. It is a perfect description of a perfect evening. Kristen looked beautiful, and she dressed up for Rob's eyes only. And Rob, he was very proud of his woman, and he showed the world that there's no other woman for him, but her. They were both happy to be with each other, and we got a glimpse into their hearts. Kristen loves Rob loves Kristen.... It's a natural love, and it's true love. They are happy, and their real fans are totally twirling for their happiness.
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:50 am (UTC)
Truer words have never been spoken. He was beaming from ear to ear, bursting with pride. Pride for his movie, but mostly pride for his beautiful princess on his arm. And she was glowing too. I can't imagine Rob pressuring her to travel from Vancouver for "lit'rally" 24 hours, only to have to return to work today. She did it. For him. For them. We were just lucky to bear witness to it.
Apr. 19th, 2011 12:59 am (UTC)
I LOVED your post!!One thing that these two have truly shown anyone is how love truly is.I am a married women of twenty years,and envy what they have,it is a beautiful thing.They don't flaunt it,they cherish it.Thank you for this post and I hope Kristen see's it,she would be proud.**standing ovation for you dear**
Apr. 19th, 2011 01:35 am (UTC)
Awww, thank you so much! I am also a happily married woman of 12 years and I still learn alot by watching how they love each other! Thank you for reading and sharing your thoughts!

-twopeas =)
Apr. 19th, 2011 01:08 am (UTC)
Excellent Post
I loved your post bestie! It is so perfect and true. I could not have said this better myself!
Apr. 19th, 2011 01:37 am (UTC)
Re: Excellent Post
Oh bestie - I just wish I had been your eyes witnessing the whole thing. But since my heart is so full from just witnessing it all via the blogs - imagine my head might have exploded if I'd seen it all firsthand! lol. I felt the love 500 miles away - but 'sweet baby jesus' you got to smell it from 5 feet away!!
Apr. 19th, 2011 01:25 am (UTC)
love it, you know I think many of us are just happy that they are happy because deep in our heart all of us want a love story like theirs, personally i wanna find someone that will love me unconditionally, and I will return it equally. R and K love story is so sweet they r perfect i hope they get married and prove that that kind of love still exist.
Apr. 19th, 2011 01:42 am (UTC)
this is just lovely!!! this is exactly how we all feel... and i am so freakin' glad we have people to share this happiness with :-))) we're such psychos! :-)
Apr. 19th, 2011 01:57 am (UTC)
OMG! Love your comment! We ARE such psychos!! And what's completely insane is we know it and are happy about it! That there are so MANY of us is what truly amazes me everyday as I watch my twitter feed spin!
Apr. 19th, 2011 02:03 am (UTC)
♥ ♥ ♥ ♥
Apr. 19th, 2011 05:45 am (UTC)
OMG! Very well written article. Thank you so much for writing it. :-)
Apr. 19th, 2011 07:24 am (UTC)
I love this.
You're totally right... about them, about her loving him and wanting to be just Rob's girl, dressed for him and not for us or the press... and, obviously, about our need for a 12 step program!!
One day i'll make a post about that and i'll link this to my journal :) hope you don't mind. :)
And I want to join you... Kristen, say fuck it more often!
Apr. 19th, 2011 08:57 am (UTC)
This was excellent! Completely captured my feelings. Thank you for sharing. xo ~Dee
Apr. 19th, 2011 10:29 am (UTC)
Liked this
You are turning into blogger!!!!! I like what you have been doing here lately. Your honesty and respect really shine through these posts.

I have been waiting for my own response to recent events in NYC. RL hasn't given me much time lately, but seeing your blog develop has been fun.

I too was impressed with the sacrifice she made to support her boyfriend. The traveling and the effort to get ready but only for his eyes did it matter. The perfect GF. Rob is the only celeb I would trade lives with.

Take care,

Apr. 19th, 2011 11:12 pm (UTC)
Re: Liked this
Awww thanks honey. Your comment means a lot. =). Sorry work is so busy rt now! Can't wait to read your 'take' on things.
Apr. 19th, 2011 10:32 am (UTC)
well said
As always, well said. It was so nice to see them happy and they looked truly, genuinely happy. That is what everyone should hope to have.
Apr. 25th, 2011 06:38 pm (UTC)
I just go to read this now. I had it in my favorites. Love it...right to the point & simply amazing. Its the total truth...Kristen did the graceful thing & let Rob have his night to shine. They truly are an amazing couple & I applaud them for how they try to keep everything private.
( 23 comments — Leave a comment )